LUST, LOVE, AND LONGING
A story Of Two Lives

Their first encounter was strange, funny, and a little bizarre.

He was behind the counter in his small, but efficient, hardware store.  He loved his business, and genuinely liked the two young male employees who helped him make this endeavor a success.  He was coming up in this world.  It was all his, and people recognized that he built it himself through long hours and hard work.

He saw her coming in; a young, slim, dark haired woman.  She had large black, shiny eyes, and extremely white skin that glowed in the reflection of the thick glass door.

She came very close to him, and even before he could ask what he could do for her, she smiled, and stated her request in a rapid, but pleasant voice.

"I have been all over town.  I couldn’t sleep all night.   Everyone I ask sends me to you, as you have the reputation for being the only one that can supply me with what I desperately need;  a special, strange, screw."

Then realizing how she said it, and how it sounded, she broke out in a great wide grin, opened her purse, and brought out a large metal bolt, and gave it to him.

Her hand was warm; she was so close to him that he could smell the intoxicating  aroma that she exuded.  It was a moist and aromatic smell, like freshly cut grass on a cool morning.

He immediately liked this female.  He carefully examined the metal object.  It was a oddly shaped bolt, obviously European, and the metric threads were badly  stripped.

"Sorry, but neither I, nor anyone I know, carries screws or bolts of this size, shape,  and length that are metric threaded.  You will either have to go to Europe and pick one up, or I can order one to be shipped to you from there."

"But this is impossible." Her face darkened. 

"This came out of my bed.  Where will I sleep?  Will it take a long time before I receive it?"

"There is another way,"  he assured her quickly.

"Your bed came apart because there is nothing to hold the bed rail to the headboard.  You can repair the bed  with equivalent American hardware, bolts, and nuts.  It can be done quickly."

"And who can do this?" She pleaded with her eyes.  She looked at him.  He looked back at her carefully.  She was obviously not really helpless.  But who could refuse assistance when she was standing so close to him.

"I will do it for you tonight,"  he whispered. " On my way home – give me your address." 

He glanced outside.  Across the street was a popular coffee shop, Fosters.

"Come, let’s have a cup of hot coffee.  You can write down your address so that  I can find you tonight."

She sat down in a quiet corner.  He brought two cups of coffee and some pastry.  They had a pleasant conversation, talking about themselves, finding out the great similarities in their lives.  Both were in their middle twenties; both had married their college sweethearts after living together for a few years.

She had a little girl of two, and he had a son of three.  They took out their respective wallets and passed each other pictures of their children.

In the evening  he rang her bell.  It was a nice apartment house on Russian Hill.  She greeted him like an old friend by giving him a light kiss on the cheek.

Her little girl smiled at him, but soon went into her room with her nanny.

The bedroom was neat and clean, except for the large bed, which was in disarray, with parts resting on the floor.  The rest of the furniture was modern, Swedish designed.

He had brought some tools with him.  He took off his jacket, and she watched his dexterity.  He possessed strong arms and fingers.  How surely he worked, and in a few minutes he extracted the old hardware from the headboard, replaced and secured it with new pieces, installed new American bolts in the bed rails, and voila, the bed was put together again.

"Can I try it now?" she asked.

"Of course," he answered her.

She removed her sandals, threw herself on the bed, and gave her body a little wiggle.  She pushed her head up against the headboard.  Everything was perfect, but when she tried this maneuver a second time, her skirt  pulled up, exposing her beautifully formed white thighs and long legs.

Her body perfume, sexy and pungently musky, engulfed him.  His impulse was to put his face on the exposed part of her anatomy, to kiss her there, and then to take her in his arms.

She noticed this and raised herself off the bed, pulling down and straightening her clothes.

He had to leave.  She escorted him to the door and suddenly threw her arms around his neck and kissed him on the lips.

He had a restless night.

In the morning, in his store, he received a phone call from her with an apology.  She had forgotten to pay him for the house call, and for the parts needed for the repair of the bed.

He laughed. "Being in your presence was payment enough, but if you want, meet me for coffee across the street at Fosters." ( She had pronounced it Fost-Air the prior day)

She met him that day, and then they met again and again in different places. They generally met in small restaurants where they had lunches and talked and talked. She bought him a new blue tie "to match his eyes".  He bought her a small pin composed of dancers.  He thought she walked  and moved  like a ballet dancer.

At first they kissed Hello and Good-by, and before long that led to general touching, and that led to some more touching in very intimate areas of their young bodies.

They knew that they must see each other more often, and they devised a way to meet each other’s spouses.  It was social, friendly, and orderly.  

One day, at one of their lunches, she held his hands across the table and sadly announced that either she will have to leave the city with her family, or go to bed with him.

"You can’t leave me now," he pleaded. 

"We went this far, I need you…..we must be together."

He didn’t want this special occasion to take place in some sleazy motel.

It had to be in a glorious place; in a big hotel.  He chose a famous large landmark that contained several restaurants.  Many people met there.  Many conferences were going on all the time.  At times people used the big expansive lobby level to cross from street to street, specially during the rainy season.

The next week was Valentine’s Day.  She suggested that they would always remember that day as their anniversary.  And so it became their place, and their special day.

He booked a room, went up, turned up the heat, placed a big bouquet of flowers he brought into a vase, called her to give her the room number, and suggested which bank of elevators to take.

He waited.  She soon arrived, and they fell in each other’s arms.  Clothes were hastily removed.  She went into the bathroom for a while, and came out wearing a new transparent silk nightgown.

He raised his eyebrows.  Why a negligee?  He removed it gently.  She stood before him like a bright shining light.  He thought that she possessed the most perfect body, the most sensuous curves in all creation.  She turned around, displaying still more perfection.   He never imagined that he could see and hold such beauty.

They fell into the open bed entwining their limbs, and it was like a dam breaking, carrying them away.  They touched the shore for a moment, and again were carried away with the flow.

There was no stopping.  So much energy; so much hunger and desire calling out to be filled.

There was no foreplay or after play.  No one mentioned, "love".  It was all consuming  lust.  And then they fell asleep for a few hours.

When they awoke, they hastily showered together, still admiring each other’s bodies.

At home that night, he told his wife that he had had a very good day, and that he was feeling happy.  Before going to sleep that night, he stood before a mirror and felt a great rush of blood reaching his head.  He stood there, looking at himself, remembering the day.   He whispered,  "I love you, I love you, I am in love with you."  

His wife heard him from the bathroom.

"Thank you, thank you," she smiled at him. "I love you too." 

The next day, and during the next weeks and months, their ardor never subsided.  It was as if they alone had discovered the magic of sex, and that they alone had to live it out to exhaustion.

And so it went on for 2 or 3 years.  Because of her he gained confidence, self-esteem, and pride of achievement.  She improved his appearance and motivated his business growth.  The store grew and was extended more than once to house  varied new types of merchandise.  He employed many more people.  His circle of friends grew.  His social position in the City grew, and influential people wanted to be his friends.

If her husband suspected anything, he kept it quiet.  He and his wife were married for life, and they loved each other, and always would.

They continued their liaison in many places.   A friend of hers, a single woman living and working in the city, gave her the key to her apartment, and they often indulged their ardor there.

Sometimes their passion became noticeable.  One day, in their favorite restaurant, sitting in a dark booth in the rear, they almost couldn’t control themselves until a friendly waitress suggested that they should use the women's rest room, and that she would keep watch until they were finished.

Anything that gets to be too hot has to melt the surroundings.  They started to have small fights about insignificant matters, sometimes soon forgotten, but many leaving marks and scars, and now and then there were minor fits of jealousy.

He also noticed that one of their friends, an accomplished musician, had her attention.  He caught them flirting and touching.  More fights and terrible words were said, and longer separations.

He suffered, and turned his own attention to other women, but it led nowhere. 

Without warning, she and her husband decided to leave the city and move to Los Angeles.  The musician friend followed.

From time to time they talked over the phone, said they missed each other, but all they now shared were words.  After about a year of separation she divorced her husband and went to live with the musician, and then married him.  They both worked in the Hollywood movie industry.

She phoned him one day to say that she was in the city helping with the production of a new "chase and pursue" movie.  She told him that she was very busy, but if he wanted to come up to her hotel room that night, she would be happy to see him.

He found her now to be a mature self confident woman, and even more attractive.  He and she started touching and groping, and soon they were in bed – just like old times.  It was spontaneous,  just as if they were continuing where they had left off. 

It was over quickly.  She looked intensely into his eyes. 

"I want you to come back tomorrow."

They kissed,  he went home, and the next morning he stopped at a delicatessen, bought some bagels and stuff, and rang her bell.  She let him in.  She was still in bed.  He undressed, and they ate together in her bed.  Their morning love making was a repeat of the previous night.

It was good, but not better.  They smiled, got dressed and she let him out, not to see him again for 40 years.

He heard about her now and then.  She had a niece living nearby who kept him informed of her activities.

The musician died.  She left California to live with her daughter, who was now a mother of two children.  Soon she might become a grandmother again.  She was now  living on the East Coast.

His wife died suddenly of a stroke.  He found several women to comfort him.  One, a great friendly lady, threw out all his female friends, and began to make his existence comfortable.  She wanted to marry him, but he hesitated (still looking to rekindle the sexual fire that he once had).  Although she tried, she couldn’t control him, and she left him in a fury.

He became morose, cranky, and lonesome.  The big home he had built when he was inspired by HER, became empty and cold.  One night he phoned her.

"I miss you, I need you, please come and visit me.  Stay as little or as long as you want to."

" And, will you take me to ‘Fost-airs’ and we can look at the pictures in our wallets as we did once?"

"Sorry, but Fost-airs is no longer in existence, but I learned to make great coffee, and I will make some for you."

She was surprised to hear his voice.  She pleaded that she was old now, but he insisted, and even begged, and then he sent her money for the journey.

At the airport, clutching a bouquet of roses, he waited for her.

As she emerged he hardly recognized her.  She still walked straight and upright, but her hair!!!!!  Her raven black, long hair, was now short, and the color a spotty brown (a wig?).  She carried one small suitcase.

She looked at him – all gray now, stooped, thick glasses covering his once blue eyes, now a dull gray.

They embraced lightly, and he drove them to his home where there was a lit fireplace, many more flowers, and champagne chilling on the bar.

"You will sleep with me in this big bed."  He showed her the ample bedroom, "And you will have your own bathroom --- I have three of them."

They dined in a nearby restaurant, had a little wine, and compared their family photos very proudly as if all these people were one great unit.

At home again, he undressed and sat on the bed.  She stayed in the bathroom a few minutes and emerged wearing a new looking transparent nightgown.  He recalled the first time when she appeared wearing such a garment.  He had wondered for a long time why she wanted him to see her so.  Much later she told him that she didn’t want to deny him any thrills, including the lifting of a wedding night garment.

He wanted to take if off now, but she stopped him.

"No, no, I am old, turn off the light."

He did not, but he dimmed the table lamp.

An hour before going to bed he swallowed a small diamond shaped blue pill.  He wanted to be sure that no complication should occur.  He glanced downward… it had worked perfectly.  The advertisers did not lie.

She came close to him with her naked body.  He couldn’t restrain himself.  He touched her gently and felt her legs.  They were rough, and he realized that she had varicose veins.  Her breasts were still ample, but no longer pert as he remembered them to be.  How he had longed for so many years to touch and kiss them again.

They made love, but not as they did in their youth.  The desire was greater than their passion could sustain.  It was over all too quickly.

She patted him, turned her back, and suggested a little sleep.  They could continue later.  Embarrassed, he fell asleep.

When he woke up, it was morning.  She had her eyes open and observed the furnishings in the room.

"Make me that coffee that you promised,"  she begged.

"I will do better than that,"  he answered.

"Lets get up and go to the Buena Vista Café and have Irish coffee and breakfast."

They showered in separate bathrooms, got dressed, and drove to the popular restaurant.  It was full of young noisy vibrant people.

They sat in a dark area, looked at each other with sadness.  They saw the wrinkles, the old age, talked again about their families, and then she asked him if he could drive her to see her niece.  They could get together later.

He picked up her suitcase, and as she asked, drove her to visit her niece.  He returned home.

When he entered his home, it was as if he saw it for the first time.  It looked cozy and warm.

He went upstairs where there was a big comfortable chair facing a television set.  Nearby was a knit blanket made for him by one of his granddaughters.  He wrapped himself in the colorful blanket, looked at the photos of his wife, smiled, closed his eyes, and his lips murmured,

"Its good to be home, free, and I am not lonesome."